The Power of Your Own Words

As I write this article, I can’t help thinking that it’s so important for anyone reading this (or my other articles) to please always keep in mind that these are my feelings and experiences. The intent of my articles is to provide a different way of looking at things and hopefully help my readers in some way. They are never intended to push my opinions on others.

A couple of reasons I really love writing, one it helps me express myself from a perspective of being real and honest with my feelings and two, I truly hope it provides awareness to others. I’m always fascinated by the words people use and the effect they have on others around them. Some words that get used regularly can become common place, but they may have an impact on others for the better or for the worse. Hence the choice on the title for this article “The Power of Your Words”!

There’s one word I made a choice along time ago not to use. Once I stopped using it, I was amazed at how many people say this word. You’ve probably heard it said when someone makes a mistake - “That’s so retarded”, or “You retard”, but you may not have thought what that word means to others. To make some sense of this let me provide a bit of background. When my son Nathan was a baby, we noticed he wasn’t responding to sounds or stimulus the way most children did. In the early stages of Nathan being diagnosed one Doctor had asked ‘how do we know Nathan is not retarded?’ and that’s when it hit! We left that Doctor and found one with more compassion, understanding and a thorough diagnosis. Around 18 months of age he was diagnosed with Autism and a Global Developmental delay.

As I write this it’s even hard for me to use the word ‘retarded’, but this story wouldn’t make any sense if I didn’t. Now this isn’t to say that I have never used the word before this experience because I did, truly not understanding what impression or feeling I would be leaving on others around me. I wondered how many times in my life I have said this around others who may have family or friends with disabilities and how that made them feel? Generally, people won’t say anything or the ones who do are often fueled by emotion and we all know how those conversations can turn out.

When we think about the impact or impression we leave on friends, peers, co-workers and family the words we choose to use really say so much about us. Sometimes these words can come from a place of emotion and that may get the best of us at times, or a word like “retarded’ just plainly becomes a habit that gets used in regular conversation. We don’t even realize it. At times it might be fun to say certain words that make you laugh but they may be hurting others around you.

Habits good or bad get formed all the time and this is no different in the words we choose to use. Self-awareness is so important for recognizing the things that work well for each of us and the things that serve us no purpose; possibly hurting others and ultimately hurting our ability to build relationships. There are lots of other words I could mention that I believe have little or no place in a conversation but this word hits home with me. I hope this helps and makes you think about the power of your own words!